I think I speak for the majority here when I say ‘change’ doesn’t work. Look closely at what Exodus says and you will see words like “lessening”. The only change that occurs is the mind convinces the body for a time that it feels nothing. With strong enough ‘motivation’ and ‘perserverence’ heaps of people delude themselves but are not really changed at all. The term ex-gay is misleading. You might convince youself that you are less-gay but its still there–Exodus says so! 😆 😆

There are a number of different ‘methods’ of ex-gay ‘therapy’ about the place which, I guess, also begs the question if its supposed to work why don’t they all do the same thing? Australia as far as I know doesn’t have any residential programs but we do have two large–and very different–ex gay groups which you may want to check out online to see how they differ we don’t like to ‘advertise’ them on here by giving too much information, the last thing they need is free publicity. If you want the names though PM me.

Your comments brought to mind this quote:

If you go hungry too long, it changes you. The habit of tension, of resistance as a daily struggle, stains the entire world. The negative virtue of endurance becomes masochistic. You measure your success not on the presence of happiness, but on the absense of temptation, the absense of desire It is the path of resignation. The horrible thing, the hair turning white overnight thing, is this: it doesn’t work. Resignation is only a part-time coping strategy. If you are still alive you can only ape death for so long. Your mind can convince your body, for a time, that it feels nothing, that you desire nothing. You can do without want. You can grid your life around with barriers and scarecrows, but want will stroll past your guards and gates. It will happen when you can not plan for it, predict it, or endure it, and once you want, once you desire, your blood surges and you are alive again. When you live in the desert, you will endlessly crave water. – Susan Smith 2008.

Thanks Sandy for welcoming Rachel to our online forum 😀 😉

Yes, there is a wealth of information in the Resources and Telling Our Stories sections. Feel free to browse through those stories of members who have been through ex gay programs … I’m sure they will give you a closer insight into how they were affected personally and/or spiritually …

Hey everyone,

Just looking at the Exodus website, it says

“It (change) requires strong motivation, hard work and perseverance. But we find hundreds of former homosexuals who have found a large degree of change – attaining abstinence from homosexual behaviours, lessening of homosexual temptations, strengthening their sense of masculine or feminine identity, correcting distorted styles of relating with members of the same and opposite gender. Some former homosexuals marry and some don’t, but marriage is not the measuring stick; spiritual growth and obedience are.”

For those of you who have taken part in an ex-gay program, residential or otherwise, I’m interested to know what kinds of methods are used in order to bring about change, like those listed above…

How exactly do Exodus and affiliates seek to achieve ‘freedom from homosexuality’? And is there a governing body which ensures all are done ethically and similarly across the board?

Cheers,

Rachel 😀

Hi Rachel…..are you new to this ‘ex-gay’ discussion?

Welcome to our space of inquiry.

As an ‘ex-gay’ survivor…..i’ve become a bit of authority about this here in Oz.

To answer your questions…..this recent statement is a mellowing down of the Exodus ministry. Previously, heterosexuality was the goal and all who were gay were going to hell. A wife on your arm and children were considered the ultimate sign of healing and the goal. But considering that within these circles hatred of your same sex orientation is preached….its difficult to not see marriage as the goal.

Once again there is the subtle inference ‘former homosexuals’…..or maybe not so subtle.

a large degree of change – attaining abstinence from homosexual behaviours, lessening of homosexual temptations, strengthening their sense of masculine or feminine identity, correcting distorted styles of relating with members of the same and opposite gender.

what these are in reality is not a change in orientation but denial, suppression, rejection and hatred of ones self. These approaches to ones same sex orientation are unhealthy and in the end cause mental health issues, cognitive dissonance and even physical illnesses. its actually driven some to suicide…..and that’s why we keep speaking up about the dangers of these programs.

the exodus message is becoming increasing irrelevant as many thousands of us have found our morality is a choice but our sexual orientation however isn’t……and live moral lives as gay men and lesbians, living purposeful, fulfilling lives living authentically.

does that help.

you’ll find some additional info on a site of mine.

http://exgayaustralianewzealand.wordpress.com/

you’ll also find a description of my many months in a live-in ex-gay program here. http://gayambassador.blogspot.com/2008/06/chapter-7-rehab-with-twist-ex-gay.html its chapter 7 of my autobiography A Life of Unlearning – a journey to find the truth.….and details the methods unsuccessfully used to try and change people.

If you go hungry too long, it changes you. The habit of tension, of resistance as a daily struggle, stains the entire world. The negative virtue of endurance becomes masochistic. You measure your success not on the presence of happiness, but on the absense of temptation, the absense of desire It is the path of resignation. The horrible thing, the hair turning white overnight thing, is this: it doesn’t work. Resignation is only a part-time coping strategy. If you are still alive you can only ape death for so long. Your mind can convince your body, for a time, that it feels nothing, that you desire nothing. You can do without want. You can grid your life around with barriers and scarecrows, but want will stroll past your guards and gates. It will happen when you can not plan for it, predict it, or endure it, and once you want, once you desire, your blood surges and you are alive again. When you live in the desert, you will endlessly crave water. – Susan Smith 2008.

what is that quote from Sandy?

And…how do I say this? Its lesbian…like really really lesbian. You’d probably get that look on your face that people get when looking at a car crash…you know…part morbid curiosity part absolute horror

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 😆  😆  😆 just had an image of arms flapping in the air and a small scream as Anthony bolts for the door  😆